Why I’m Getting Another iPhone

<originally published on Medium on 6 Mov. 2017>

You won’t like my reason

Why the hell do you care? Are you me? No. Are you someone who is in my family or circle of friends who would actually have a need to care? No.

No one, outside of a fantastically small group of people needs to know or care what phone I’m getting or why. No one. If you need to know, you already do.

You know what you should be doing instead of reading these kinds of monocellular clickbait articles? You should be like this kid:

This kid knows

He doesn’t know what phone I’m getting, he doesn’t care. He’s minding his business. This kid has his life in order. Toys, TV and snacks. That is a happy damned kid.

Why do you care what phone, computer or car I or anyone else who isn’t an actual friend of yours is getting?

As far as the people writing this nonsense: do you ever get tired of being the only person in your circle-jerk?